Mummy.... T_T

i miss my family badly...

very very very very very very miss them...

T.T

i don't want stay at here!

i want back ss!!!

how sad need wait till mac 11 only can back. =(

and just back for injection, 

then Sunday or Monday need rush back kampar bcoz of the mp and cb assignment.

Had a chat with him just now...

huan ask me how? got feel better?

i ask myself...got feel better?

hmm...

i don't know...

i think myself really so "fan jian"

when ppl treat me good i dont want, 

i like torture myself, = = 

i know this is my turn to try the feel..

actually i have many things want to tell and ask him,

but i dont know how to ask, 

maybe i know even i ask he also not going to tell me,

i don't want to stand the feel being rejected again...

when he told me we start all over again ok, bcoz we ady have gap and misunderstanding bla bla bla 

hmm.. what should i say?

should say yes ok right?

yea.. but i dont know why i not willing to say yes.

= =

what start all over again...

my heart telling me : I DON'T WANT!

right now, i really dont want,

but i dont know myself de feelings towards him too.

zzzzzzzzzzz

how stupid am i.

when i saw he close with any gals i will feel pek cek! bu shuang!

but my fren told me he close with any gals is non of my business~

i know la...

but the feelings i cannot control ma...

just feel bu shuang la!

when he treat me cool i also bu shuang la!

(altot i know i b4 also treat him like tat)

but i really feel bu shuang la! 

=(

or like they say

maybe now is bcoz i too fan, too lonely, too stress, i need rely on somebody,

need someone to listen to me,

need someone to let me find,

need someone to acc me.

i dont know!

=.=

arghhhhh...

and my 自尊心 very high too,

when i very ri qing to you 

and i never say something to anyone like tat but say to u then get the respond is cool like hell,

i will very hurt,

and whatever u say or no matter how many times sorry you say to me,

my heart is hurt ady.

i forgive you,

but i cant forget my pain and my zi zun.

i don't know how to say to you when face to face

bcoz i still cant forget what you told me this afternoon and your respond...




很多时候不是说重新来过就能解决问题的......
hmm....